3 Facts for the Day

15 02 2013

1. Valentine’s Day is actually a special holiday for me. It’s not so much the actual day, but rather the memory it stirs in me. I returned back home to Mississippi in late 2007. It was a difficult time for me. I was suffering reverse culture shock after having been away from home so long. I was also going through an unexpected divorce. I won’t go into details about this past relationship other than to say, I didn’t seek God in the beginning or throughout the relationship. That in itself should not make its failure seem so unexpected after all. Either way, I was suffering from depression and found it difficult to reach for anything that brought true happiness. Within a short year of my return, my Mother passed away. This event only added to my already gloomy approach to life. I think a part of me felt like I thrived in this darkness. I would often jot down morbid poetry that Ben admits now frightened him at the time. 2. My dearest Ben was there with me through it all. Like the poetry, there were things I did he didn’t approve of and vice versa. The February after my Mom died I went card shopping for Valentine’s Day. It was only natural that he would be my Valentine, even though our relationship status was questionable. I had been pushing him away. I knew he still loved me, but was allowing me my space, perhaps because he wasn’t sure what else to do. I had cocooned myself into my living room, smothering in my own solidarity. As I stood in the store aisle reading through cards, I found one I rather liked. It had a silver heart attached to it that read “love always.” It hit me then, or rather God hit me. His voice in my head said, “Brie, if you’re gonna give him this card, you owe it to him to really mean it.” I stood there thinking it over and realized, I really did. I always had.
3. I thought of a song this morning as I thought of my forever Valentine. Its lyrics go “Who will love me for me? Not for what I have done or what I will become?” My husband truly exemplifies Ephesians 5, loving his wife as Christ loves the church. After you’ve been rejected in life, you can often be afraid of love, especially a love that is non biased and unconditional. We love each other this way. Every Valentine’s Day I remember when I chose to not be afraid, but rather to love and be loved. Happy Valentine’s Day to my sweetheart of all times, my rock, my companion, my help mate, my lover, my best friend, my husband. I love you more each day.
That is all 🙂

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